Today is "The Fellowship of the Ring"
Starring Elijah Wood, Ian McKellen, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Ian Holm and Hugo Weaving
You just somehow know that when an explosive birthday party turns into a reluctant ring giving episode where a wizard towers over a hobbit in a dark moment of good vs. evil, that an adventure to Mordor or some dark land, is bound to be suggested.
Armed with a powerful ring that he can't use, a fellowship of crazy, mix-matched warriors and no decent pair of boots, Frodo (Wood) sets forth.
Frodo runs, walks, strolls and tip-toes while the elves spring up from all places located in the woods and the valleys of Rivendell. A hidden wooded realm. And by some stretch of fate, an elf is even located in Moria for a short time.
Thinking he'll be going home soon, Frodo sighs a sigh of relief until Elrond proves what a no-brainer that would be!
Onward the hobbits, men, elf and dwarf go onto great adventure and legend. The fate of Middle Earth hangs by a thread, stands on the point of a knife and even blazes through a very irritated-looking giant eyeball. It's the first installment of J.R.R. Tolkien's great epic tale of the Lord of the Rings.
This has been my Movie Review. One Ring to wear or not to wear, that is the question.
Today is "The Two Towers"
Starring Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Karl Urban and Miranda Otto
First, there was the parting of the fellowship that brought on orcs, tree herders, and a very tired dwarf who didn't want to run all over Isengard, Rohan and other vast stretches of wild lands.
Second, when Saruman sends a very sizable orc army to Helm's Deep to wipe out everyone, you know why Gandalf had to show up to prove that not all white wizards were evil and he happened to be a white wizard now due to the nasty spill with Moria's Balrog. Don't ask.
Meanwhile, Gandalf performs an exorcism, Eomer almost strangles Grima, Grima would like to get his hands on Eowyn's throat, hair, body, anything he can get away with. Gollum has an in-depth conversation with something that cannot be exorcised and Sam and Frodo seem to have a lot of run-ins with wraiths on wings for four-foot, near-to-the-ground hobbit beings.
Merry and Pippin help the trees and forests and although not necessarily tree-huggers, they do have to hold on pretty tight when the tree-herders begin their march toward a battle plain where elves and men, and the dwarf are tossed by orcs and by each other. Ents also toss around some orcs for good measure. And how!
Aragorn (Mortensen) survives a fall off a cliff, elves make good on their promise to head to the Havens, Elrond makes good on looking very serious and wargs make an interesting flavor for stew. It's the second installment of J.R.R. Tolkien's great epic tale of the Lord of the Rings.
This has been my Movie Review. Alas, poor Smeagol, for the precious knew him well.
Today is "The Return of the King"
Starring Viggo Mortensen, Liv Tyler, Elijah Wood, Orlando Bloom, Dominic Monaghan and Ian McKellen
After getting stuck in various situations in Mordor, Gollum isn't being of any help when he leads Frodo into a spider's abode where he is doomed to become its dinner. Sam, of course, comes to battle it but should have re-thought that whole climbing down the long and tall stairs only to discover he'd have to re-climb them. It's just plain dumbassery, and this actually never happens in the book.
Aragorn has, by now, overcome his fear of dark mountains and caves as has Legolas, but after Balrog breathed especially hot fire through Moria's Halls, Gimli wasn't so fond of another venture into a dark mountain realm. Let alone one that had the dubious title of The Paths of the Dead attached to it. But ahead the three warriors went. Man, Elf and Dwarf. The horses, being somewhat more intelligent, ran off before they could catch them.
Merry dons armor and rides with Eowyn into glorious battle. Pippin dons majestic garb and bears servitude to the Stewart of Gondor. He also bears the tedious and eternal drone of the insane Denethor going on about his son, his city, his halls, his aches, his pains, his dinner, his problems and the stupid hissy fit that Rohan allegedly started with Mordor. Also bitching about King Theoden's inability to help Gondor out. Pippin could not rightly explain that Theoden was temporarily possessed by Saruman, because it seemed like a dead issue anyway. Pippin, did however, set a beacon on fire to signal the lands to war. Denethor wanted help without the fires, but then, he was insane whereas Theoden had an excuse of being temporarily possessed by Saruman. Denethor has no excuse and just needs to shut up.
The Elves go, some stay, Arwen stays, Elrond lightens up a little. Frodo and Sam get even messier dealing with Gollum, orcs, spiders and volcanic ash. Legolas and Gimli rack up the body count until the dead oathbreakers come and wipe out the remainder of the orc army and lots of strange battlements. A burning fall to the death, executed by Denethor would have been spectacular had the city not been preoccupied with being bombarded with orcs, witch-kings, wraiths on wings, monsters, mammoth-sized creatures and scary-looking battering rams. It's the final installment of J.R.R. Tolkien's great epic tale of the Lord of the Rings.
This has been my Movie Review. Eye of a newt, and toe of something really big still only counts as one!
(Note: Originally posted as three separate reviews but now all combined, making this a Multiple Movie Review)
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